


I’ll Be Your Strength

by pasteluthors



Category: Supergirl
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-06-22 07:12:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19662382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pasteluthors/pseuds/pasteluthors
Summary: After learning the truth about Supergirl and confronting Kara, Lena is in a terrible accident that leaves her dependent upon the help of others. Namely, the one person who cares about her the most (who she happens to hate right now.)





	1. Chapter 1

“You’re with me, right?” “Always.”

Lena scoffs at herself as she pours her third glass of her favorite scotch. Letting the alcohol burn down her throat as that line runs through her head so many times until it’s all she can think of.

She had been so blind to see what was in front of her all this time that she now hates herself for being so naive. Her best friend — the first person to ever make her feel at home somewhere — had lied right to her face. For three years. She fells like an idiot as she thinks back on all those times that Kara made her heart flutter like no one else did. She had developed strong feelings for the reporter, but that isn’t relevant now. Now, she is so conflicted that she doesn’t know how she should feel towards Kara — _Supergirl_.

Lillian’s voice rings through her ears in that moment, reminding her how pathetically naive and gullible she’s been. Those thoughts, mixed with a few glasses of alcohol, are what prompts Lena towards Kara’s apartment from her own. Her feet move with a mind of their own as she takes the journey on foot, and before she knew it, she’s pounding on the blonde’s door full well knowing that the woman is home.

It takes a few seconds for Kara to see who her visitor is. When she sees that it is LCorp’s CEO, she pulls open to door to a slightly drunk Lena stumbling back out of surprise. Now that she is here, she can feel the anger surging inside of her.

“Lena, what are you doing here? Is everything okay?” Gentle yet concerned blue hues glance over the clearly drunk woman in front of her, but Lena doesn’t respond to either question until she storms inside of the all-too-familiar apartment. Kara slowly follows after, worried that if she moved too quickly she would frighten an already upset Lena.

She shuts the door slowly, and when she turns to face the woman, Lena is nearly charging at her. Pressing a finger hard against the kryptonian’s chest, effectively pushing her back against the door.

Her bright, beautiful, full-of-life hues widening with surprise as she notices the tears in Lena’s eyes. “Lena—“

“You lied to me, Kara!” She pushes against the blonde with a force that would hurt any human, but knows now that it doesn’t mean the alien any harm. Kara’s brows raise in confusion. Hands press against the door behind her as if bracing herself for something.

“Lena, what are you—“

“Shut the fuck up, Supergirl! I know about all of your lies! You’ve been lying to from the moment we met! Everything you say to me, everything you’ve ever told me-…it’s all been a damn lie! You _used_ me.” Lena pushes harder against the alien, who, despite being able to be crushed by tons and walk away unharmed, is forced back by pure fear.

She’s never seen the woman so angry. So…hurt.

”I—“ Kara swallows thickly. She wants to deny the truth, as she always has around Lena, and say that there is no way she can be the superhero, but the look in Lena’s eyes told her that they are way past the denial. Lena _knows_.

“I didn’t mean it to be like this, Lena,” she sighs, glassy blue hues meeting tearful green ones. Her voice on the verge of breaking as she speaks the woman’s name. “I had every intention of telling you the truth once we dealt with Lex, but I—…I didn’t know how to tell you. Please, you have to believe that I didn’t want to hurt you.”

Lena scoffs and rolls her eyes, daring to laugh at the apology. “Hurt me? How could I not be hurt when you’ve been hiding something like _this_? How were you expecting me to feel? Like you were supposed to be protecting me by not telling me? You never truly cared about me at all, did you? Our entire friendship, it’s nothing but a _lie_. Based off of nothing but…but lies and distrust.” She backs off to take a few steps away from Kara and takes the break to dry her eyes, though the tears don’t want to stop. Instead, they burn down her cheeks, hitting the floor with a loud splash to Kara’s ears.

“No, our friendship is _not_ based on a lie! Everything I did for you, all those times I was there for you, they were all because I care about you. None of that was a lie, I promise you that. I never used you, Lena. Never.” Kara struggles to keep her emotions at bay, but a few tears stream down her cheeks despite how hard she fights to hold them in. She notices Lena hugging herself the same way she does when she feels alone, and the idea that she’s pushed her to this point hurts. More than anything.

Lena wipes more tears off of her cheek and her lower lip begins to tremble as she hugs herself. She feels so small and inferior — two things that Lena Luthor hates feeling. “I don’t know what to believe anymore. Everything that comes out of your mouth, all of it, more lies! I can’t do this anymore, Kara,” her voice lowers to almost nothing but a whisper but falls upon Kara’s ears like a scream. “I’m done.”

The blonde’s heart drops as she watches the woman walk out with those last words. The fact that Lena can’t even look at her while saying them tells her that she truly means it. Their friendship is over.

Kara buries her face in her palms as the tears start to flow like a river now that she is alone. Hot, salty tears burning as they roll down her skin and fall to the floor. She stands in the middle of her apartment trembling. The Girl of Steel broken down by the one of the most important people in her life.

This is exactly what she wanted to avoid going through, but it had always been inevitable to end this way. She kept the biggest secret possible from her best friend, and now Lena hated her for it.

Lena ignores her tears blurring her vision and the wobbliness in her stride as she enters the elevator and pressed the ground floor button. Once the elevator comes to a stop, she hears for the doors and steps out onto the empty sidewalk. She’s too distraught and drunk at this point to have her bearings, and begins heading wherever her feet take her. For a few steps, it’s in the opposite direction of her apartment. Until she decides to cross the street to see where the concrete will take her.

Hands rub her eyes as she steps down off of the curb to try to clear her vision, though provide just the perfect amount of time for her to be blinded from the car barreling down the street towards her. She has no time to hear the car’s tires squeal on the ground as the driver attempts to slam on the breaks, before she’s hit hard. The impact flinging her body into the pavement twenty feet away.

The second her head hits the ground, everything goes dark. No pain, no blood, just darkness. And just for a second, her breathing comes to a stop.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone meets Kara at the hospital, where Supergirl is a crying mess in front of the waiting room. Big sister Alex is here to save the day, as always.

~~~~~~~~As the sirens come down the street, Kara suddenly perks up out of her distraught state. There are rarely ever any sirens in the city without her knowing about them first.

She rushes down the stairs to see a crowd gathered on the sidewalk outside of her building. A few others who live in her building are talking with each other trying to piece together what happened, and plenty others have already stopped to form the crowd across the street, which is now blocked off with police cars.

Her eyes land on a car stopped in the middle of the street. It doesn’t seem to have any damage and she can see the driver of the car standing next to it. Hands clasped together on top of his head as he watches the paramedics load a body onto a gurney.

How could she have possibly missed all of this commotion? She’s Supergirl for Rao’s sake, she is supposed to protect every person in the city, whether that is from a robbery or a car accident.

Whoever is being loaded into that ambulance could have been saved had she not been caught up in her own selfish emotions.

Then, her heart sinks. She catches a glimpse of the lifeless, bloodied figure just before the back doors of the ambulance close. Instantly recognizing that pale skin and jet black hair.

_ Lena. _

In seconds, she lands over at the hospital in her Supergirl suit, anxiously waiting for the truck to arrive. She keeps her focus on the CEO’s weak heartbeat and shallow breath, which has become a tactic that she uses quite often.

The wait is only eight minutes, but it drags on like an eternity. The only comfort she receives is the fact that Lena still has a heartbeat. Though, from what she can hear from the paramedics talking to one another, it doesn’t sound good.

“Supergirl, what are you doing here?” The ambulance driver asks as she parks the truck and swiftly hops out to open the back doors. Out comes the second paramedic, but Kara zooms over — much to their surprise — to help get the bed out of the vehicle.

“We’ve got it from here, Supergirl,” the other paramedic attempts to wave her out of the way but Kara keeps up with their pace as they enter the hospital.

“She’s a friend of mine. I need to make sure she’s alright.” The kryptonian has to fight through the shakiness in her voice as the paramedics look her over, but Kara has gotten used to every look she gets. She is too focused on the unconscious woman that they’re bringing into the hospital.

“You can’t be back there—“

“Then I’ll wait by the doors!” Kara’s outburst shuts the two women up and they focus instead on getting Lena back to the ER.

It’s now, in this moment, that Kara gets to see just how badly the woman is injured. There’s blood pooling next to Lena’s head, where she sees with her x-ray vision a crack in her skull just below the giant gash. She’s glad that Lena isn’t awake in that moment because it saves her from feeling every broken bone and inch of road rash all over her body.

Tears fill her brims when she’s told that she isn’t allowed any further. It’s unlike Kara to obey orders when it comes to those she cares about, but she has no other option than to watch through the small windows until the three woman disappear around the corner. A trail of blood being left behind them.

Everyone there in hospital stops and stares at a tearful Supergirl turning and moving to sit in a chair in the waiting area. Those who aren’t in a rush murmur amongst themselves, but their whispers fall onto deaf ears. All that Kara can focus on hearing is her best friend’s heartbeat.

She hears everything going on in that room. She hears Lena’s heart stop once and hear when they get it started again.

She hears the doctors ordering plenty of x-rays and CT scans to determine the extent of the woman’s injuries.

She hears them rush Lena into surgery nearly twenty minutes after she arrives in the hospital.

After nearly an hour of waiting, a nurse comes out to update Supergirl on everything that she already knows, and informs her that Lena is going to be in surgery for a few hours. She’s told that she will have to wait. Kara simply nods.

Those who were staring are now either gone or have started to pretend that having a superhero in the waiting room is just as normal as anything else going on in there.

After the nurse leaves, Kara zooms back to her apartment to change into her civilian clothes and grab her phone. She then texts Alex, J’onn, Brainy, Nia, and even James everything that has happened in the last two hours.

Now back in her normal clothes, she heads back to the hospital to wait. When she looks up into the half empty waiting room, she sees Alex and immediately falls into her arms. Alex rubs her sister’s back soothingly as the alien sobs against her shoulder. Trying to comfort a distraught Kara is always tough when neither of them can control their emotions.

“Hey, it’s alright. She’s gonna be okay, Kara.” The director’s hands soothingly run up and down her sister’s back. Kara feels strong arms holding on to her just like the way she would hold on to Alex when they were younger; when Kara would be scared.

“It was bad, Alex. Her— Her heart, I heard it stop…She almost died, and it would have been my fault!” Her words are somewhat muffled with sobs but Alex is a pro at understanding crying Kara at this point.

As a doctor herself, she knows how bad any head injury can be. Between what Kara and the nurse have told her, she’s truthfully surprised that Lena is still alive.

“Hey,” She leans back and forces Kara to look at her. When she meets those teary eyes, she brings a hand up to her sister’s cheek to wipe the tears away. “This wasn’t your fault, Kara. Whatever happens, it’s not on you. You can’t blame yourself for this. She’s going to be just fine, okay? Now, please stop crying before you make me cry. I don’t want anyone here to know I have feelings.”

The heavyhearted chuckle that comes in between sobs brings a smile to Alex’s lips. She has always been a pro at getting Kara to laugh, even in the toughest situations.

The two of them finally sit down and wait. As the rest of their friends arrive, everyone hugs and then sits somberly as they wait for any news.

An  _ eight _ hour surgery. It takes eight — nearly nine — hours for doctors to fix as much of the damage as they can.

One of the surgeons arrives and inform everyone how things went. They all release a breath of relief upon hearing that Lena is going to make it through the night for now. When asked by Kara if they can see her, that’s when the bad news comes.

“I’m afraid we don’t know when Ms. Luthor is going to wake up. With an injury as bad as hers, it could take anywhere from a couple hours to a few days. If you’d like, I can take one or two of you to her room and so that she can wake up to some familiar faces. I’d ask if any of you are family, but I’m well aware of the Luthors. Whoever is closest to her may follow me.”

The group looks between each other and silently agrees that Kara and Alex are the two who will stay with Lena for now.

“You guys go home and get some rest,” Alex gives J’onn and Nia a final hug. “I’ll text you as soon as anything happens.”

They all disperse reluctantly and the doctor leads the sisters down a few hallways until they reach the patient rooms. He leads them into the correct room and shuts the door behind them to explain just how severe the injuries are. Though, he is interrupted and leaves to take care of other business.

When Kara finally sees the aftermath of everything, she can’t help the audible gasp that leaves her lips. Nor can she stop the sudden river leaving her brims and trickling down her cheeks.

The woman’s head is wrapped up and bandaged from her surgery. Her gentle face partially swollen and bruised. Pale skin covered all over in dark bruises and road rash. Because she was hit from the side, it seems like her right shoulder and right leg took a bad hit from the impact.

A tube runs out of the side of her mouth in order to keep her breathing through a machine. The doctor had explained that she has been put in a medically induced coma in order to keep her brain from swelling. But this doesn’t indicate exactly how long it will take for her to come out of it. Could be hours, could be days.

Kara has never seen the woman look so fragile and vulnerable as long as they’ve known each other. The sight of her lying there completely helpless yet entirely peaceful has both sisters crying.

Being the big sister that she is, Alex takes the kryptonian in her arms and holds her close. Trying to reassure her that this isn’t the last time they’ll see Lena alive.

“She’s gonna be okay, Kara. She’s gonna be okay…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg thank you all for liking this! I hope not to disappoint anyone!! Oh, and to all of you worried about Lena: she’s not paralyzed! Just wait and see :)
> 
> Feel free to follow me on twitter @earpsluthors :)))


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara can’t eat, sleep, or move while her best friend nears death. She also can’t hold back the truth any longer.

Three days. It has already been three days of sitting in that small, dark room waiting for Lena to wake up, and there has yet to be any improvement. The window sill is already lined with flowers, stuffed animals, and plenty of “Get Well Soon” cards, most of which are from LCorp employees. The few friends that Lena has have been sitting there by her side every second they are able to.

Kara hasn’t left that hospital since the day of the accident. In fact, she hasn’t left the woman’s side since the doctor first brought her and Alex there days ago. J’onn and Alex tried to pressure her into going home and getting some rest, but knowing how stubborn Kara is, eventually gave up on trying to move her from that seat.

There’s a knock on the door and Kara reluctantly answers it to find Nia there holding bags of food for them both. She hates taking her eyes off of Lena even for a second, fearing that as soon as she did would be when something happens.

“Alex told me you liked potstickers, so I brought about six boxes of them.” Nia holds the two white grocery bags filled with food and offers a hopeful smile and a suggestive raised brow.

“Thanks Nia,” Kara forces a grin back though at this point, they are close enough for Nia to know it isn’t genuine. Then again, it doesn’t take a detective to read Kara in a situation like this.

The brunette steps inside and places the food down on the small table next to the couch, eyes catching a glimpse of the broken CEO lying there. She wishes, more than anything, that she could somehow use her powers and figure out a way to help, but fears that she would only make things worse by trying.

Kara takes her spot back next to the bed. It’s clear she doesn’t have much of an appetite, but Nia brings her a container of potstickers regardless.

“You have to eat, Kara. Sitting here worrying isn’t going to make her any better, and you know she wouldn’t want you to beat yourself up over this.”

“I know…” Kara sighs as she takes the container and stares down at its contents. “It just feels like my fault. If I had told her the truth earlier, she wouldn’t be lying on her death bed right now.” The blonde’s voice breaks at the mention of Lena dying. She’s tried so hard not to think about it, but the thought has been in the back of her head for days now.

“Hey,” Nia grabs for Kara’s hand and gives it a gentle squeeze, lips curling into a frown as she watches the super mentally beat herself up over this. “This isn’t your fault, Kara. You can’t put the blame on yourself for this. It was an accident, that’s all.”

Kara nods hesitantly. She wants to believe that this isn’t her fault, but she can’t help but think it is. It’s killing her, eating her up from the inside.

She eats only two boxes of potstickers while Nia stays. It’s about half of what her normal appetite allows her, but at least Nia is able to get her to put something in her stomach.

After the woman leaves, Kara goes back to the side of the bed, where she watches over Lena until she can’t hold back the tears any longer.

The droplets burn as they roll down her cheeks. Her throat starts to close up, hands start to tremble, breathing becomes shaky. And it’s not long before Kara is sitting there sobbing.

She grabs a hold of one of Lena’s hands with both of her own and squeezes it as if doing so would get the woman to wake up. Of course, it does nothing. No reaction from the lifeless body.

After crying her eyes out dry, she finally gathers herself enough to speak without her voice giving out.

“I know you can’t hear me, but…I’m going to tell you this anyway. Maybe you can hear what’s going on out here, maybe not. But if I don’t say this now, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.” Kara pauses and bring a hand up to brush a few loose strands of hair out of Lena’s face. She lets her hand linger there and cup the woman’s cheek while her thumb brushes over a few cuts on the fair skin.

“I can’t believe that you can look so beautiful while being in a coma.” Kara laughs softly and sadly. 

“I should have told you the truth, Lena. I wanted to tell you so many times before, but…I always chickened out. I thought that the truth would hurt you more than the lie did, but it seems like that wasn’t the case. I thought I was protecting you, keeping you out of danger. Everyone who knows the truth, they’ve all suffered because of it and I didn’t want you to get hurt, too. I care about you too much to ever see you hurt. Watching you leave, I wanted to grab you and stop you, but I was too afraid. Now that you are here because of me, I don’t want to risk never telling you the truth.

You are my best friend, someone I feel like myself around. You are the strongest woman I know. From the moment we first met, I could tell you were special, but I never knew why. Now, I do know.” Kara pauses to give her strained voice a break while she watches Lena, so peacefully asleep.

“Every time I’m around you, my heart starts racing and I feel like I’m floating. I don’t have much experience with feelings, which is why it took me so long to understand why you made me feel this way. The truth is…I love you. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone in my life. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. You are an entirely new kind of feeling, and as much as it scares me, I can’t get enough of it.

I love you, Lena Luthor. And seeing you like this…it’s breaking me because all I want to do is tell you how much I love you.”

Just as Kara finishes her monologue, there’s a knock at the door with the nurse coming in to change out IVs. Her and Kara exchange a few words after the woman notices her red, swollen eyes, but there isn’t much interaction after that.

With the break to get up and stretch her legs, she finally decides to leave the room to talk a walk down to the nearest vending machine. The fear that something will happen while she’s gone is still there in the back of her head, but she figures that the nurse is more equipped to handle that situation more than she is.

It’s only when Kara is halfway back to the room that she hears the commotion. She had been so in her thoughts that she missed a bunch of the nurses rushing around frantically, trying to find the doctor.

It’s not much, but she’s able to make out a couple words:

_ She’s awake. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so sorry that this took me forever to do! I hope to update more often, but school starts soon and I’m not sure how much time I’ll have then.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, I tried to make it only a little bit heart-wrenching :’)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena wakes up, and there’s more angst to come.

The commotion takes a while to die down. Kara is allowed in the room while the doctor does his procedural tests to check for any permanent damage caused by the accident. Despite Lena finally being awake and out of the coma, however, she’s mostly unresponsive. She’s able to squeeze the doctor’s finger and wiggle her toes, though her eyes remain closed as she takes time to come back to the real world.

As all of this happens, Kara is standing quietly in the corner of the room. She sends everyone a text alerting them of the news but warns not to visit just yet. Fearing that too many people would only overwhelm Lena when she clearly didn’t need that.

It takes a while for the doctor to look over Lena. He explains that he believes there isn’t any paralyzation from the accident but still warns that they won’t know anything until the CEO is more alert and able to communicate better. For now, he tells Kara that she needs plenty of rest and a watchful eye.

A new schedule is made between the nurse shifts, and about an hour or so later, everyone except Kara leaves the room.

Half of the room’s lights are turned off now to give Lena some ambiance to sleep. Kara tries to talk to her, but only gets some weak thumbs-ups in response. She can’t help but laugh when Lena signs to her that she doesn’t understand what is going on.

Kara leans in briefly to give a reassuring kiss to the woman’s forehead. “It’s okay, Lee. Don’t worry about anything right now, just get some rest, okay?”

And with a final thumbs-up, Kara sits back and allows her own eyes to close. It’s the first time since the accident that she is able to sleep, but it’s short-lived when the first round of check-ups start.

Alex and J’onn arrive not too long after being texted. Kara fills them in as the doctor finishes up his second check-in post-Lena waking up, and it’s not until they are all alone in the room that Alex notices something different.

“Hey, Lena,” Alex says with a soft smile while turning to face the bed. Kara and J’onn turn to see that the woman finally has her eyes opened, and Kara lets out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.

“How are you feeling?” J’onn follows and goes to the opposite side of the bed as the two sisters. As he takes hold of her hand, Lena focuses on him and gives him a weak smile.

“Never been better.” Her voice is so small and weak and it makes Kara feel even more guilty. She’s never heard the woman speak with such a fragile tone, and it breaks her heart just a little bit more to think that this is all her fault.

J’onn smiles as he seems to telepathically tell Lena something that only they can hear, and it makes the woman smile. Kara and Alex look at each other in confusion but don’t question it.

“Well look, we’re going to leave you be and let you get some rest. I’ve got to head back to the DEO, but I’ll be by tomorrow with plenty of stories to tell. I’m glad you’re awake, Lena.” The older Danvers sister gives Lena a gentle pat on her arm on her way out. And J’onn isn’t too far behind her.

“I’ve got to go, too.” He says in a tone that makes Kara believe that he knows the real reason why she wants to be alone with the Luthor. He doesn’t read Kara’s mind unless absolutely necessary, but something tells her that he knows what is going through her head at that moment.

After they both leave, Kara reluctantly turns back to face the bed and notices Lena watching her warily. There’s a long moment of silence between them until Kara finally speaks just to get rid of the uncomfortable tension between them.

“I’m glad you’re feeling-“

“Don’t.” Lena is quick to cut her off despite not having enough energy to talk much. She’s now looking at Kara through tears in her eyes; the burning in her throat making it even more impossible to speak. “I want you gone now.”

Her words are barely spoken, but heard loud and clear. Kara’s heart is completely shattered with the final blow, but she doesn’t put up a fight. They’re both too tired to do this right now, so Kara silently nods and makes her way to the door to leave.

With her hand on the handle, she turns over her shoulder to ask, “Did you hear anything I said to you earlier?”

“I did.” Lena replies, tears now falling down cheeks. “But I don’t care.”

Kara inhales sharply and pushes through the door before she has the chance to let anyone see her cry. She speeds out of the hospital for the first time in days, but doesn’t end up at home. She ends up flying for thousands of miles until she’s somewhere in the middle of the Arctic. A place where absolutely no one could watch her break down entirely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I don’t update too often. School starts next week and I’ll be even busier, but I’ll try not to forget about this haha. Thanks for reading so far :)

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoy this! I’d love any and all feedback :)


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